When Logic Fails: A Control Panel for Your Calm

Before an important conversation, thoughts speed up, shoulders rise and you want to do something immediately. A few familiar actions can help: sit more comfortably, notice your surroundings and let your breathing find a gentle rhythm. They create a pause in which to choose the next step. Practise on an ordinary day so you do not have to search for instructions from scratch later.

The aim is to bring more support and choice to actions available to you. You can still feel anxious while asking a question, requesting time or seeking support. Begin with one technique you feel comfortable trying and notice what changes.

If possible, pause the rushing for a minute. Place your feet on the floor, sit with your back supported or find a comfortable standing position. Name the situation specifically: ‘I’m waiting for a conversation and feel very nervous.’ Then ask what is needed now: answering a question, waiting for someone or leaving a dangerous place? With an actual threat, protection and help come first.

Let’s imagine: Maryna is organising a concert. A technical delay occurs shortly before the start. She rushes between colleagues and stops hearing their answers. She pauses in a side aisle, notices the floor supporting her feet and identifies one task: ask the technician for a realistic readiness time. An action becomes available that she can carry out in sequence.

Breathe gently, without forcing: a soft breath through the nose and an easy breath out through the mouth, if comfortable. You can count to five, or a smaller comfortable number. No breath-holding or maximum inhalation is required. If focusing on breathing increases discomfort, stop and turn attention to surrounding objects.

Counting patterns can be useful prompts, but a comfortable rhythm matters more than achieving particular numbers. Try a few minutes at a quiet time. Notice whether it helps you rush a little less and observe more easily. That experience can be useful before a conversation or after a demanding day.

Grounding turns attention towards available sensations. In the ‘5–4–3–2–1’ version, notice five visible things, four touch sensations, three sounds, two smells and one taste. Choose safe, accessible sensations and skip an unsuitable item. You can begin more simply: name a few colours and notice the chair supporting you.

Imagine another situation: Denys is waiting for a job interview at a botanical garden. He has already pictured forgetting every answer. Sitting on a bench, he observes a nearby leaf’s shape, light on the floor and the sound of a door. Then he returns to the nearest task: check the interviewer’s name and prepare his first question.

What matters in this scene is the move from an anxious film about the future to where Denys is now. He may still worry, but has specific points of reference. Choose one accessible object and describe its colour, shape and position. Your eyes can stay open; you do not have to notice everything at once.

Progressive muscle relaxation gently tenses and releases separate muscle groups in turn. For example, lightly clench one hand for a few seconds, release it and notice the difference. Keep breathing freely. Pain and strong effort are unnecessary; skip injured or painful areas and check with a doctor first if medical limitations apply.

You can also begin without tensing: place your hands more comfortably, release your jaw or adjust your shoulders. Find a position that makes staying engaged easier. Before the interview Denys notices he was squeezing his hands tightly and rests them loosely on his thighs. This small action becomes part of his preparation.

Choose someone you can call or message beforehand. Prepare a simple request: ‘I feel anxious. Please stay with me for a few minutes and help me identify the next step.’ If you are beside someone feeling overwhelmed, speak briefly, offer a comfortable place and ask what suits them. Calm presence and practical help may matter more than additional instructions.

For Maryna, that step is asking a colleague: ‘While I check the delay, please tell the presenter.’ The task is shared, and she can do one thing. Self-support includes acting on the circumstances that create tension.

Choose one or two familiar supports: body position, gentle breathing, describing an object or asking for help. Write the sequence simply: ‘Sit — notice support — look around — name the nearest action.’ Try it on a calm day and change what feels inconvenient.

Keep a short reflection in a MriyaRun journal or paper workbook: what was happening; which technique you tried; what changed; and what help is still needed. A useful result might be that you stopped rushing, listened to an answer or requested a pause in time. The entry helps you select approaches based on your own experience.

After the tense moment, return to the source of the workload. Clarify a deadline, share responsibilities, plan rest or discuss a difficult conversation. Calming skills support these decisions by giving you more room to examine the situation and act in sequence.

A brief clarification: exercises work differently for different people and do not replace treatment. Recurring panic, avoiding ordinary activities or persistent anxiety warrant professional support. New severe chest pain, especially with breathlessness, sweating or feeling faint, must not automatically be labelled anxiety: seek urgent medical help. Stop an exercise that makes you feel worse.

Start with a small practice on an ordinary day. Find comfortable support, try one gentle technique and name the next manageable step. Gradually you build your own set of actions to turn to when feeling anxious.

MriyaRun web journal · Journals and workbooks catalogue

Sources for the guidance: NHS: Breathing exercises for stress; Royal United Hospitals Bath: Mindfulness & Grounding Exercises; Birmingham and Solihull Mental Health NHS: Progressive Muscle Relaxation; NHS: Panic disorder; NHS: Chest pain.