Why Emotional Intelligence Matters More Than IQ: Tools, Books, and Practice
In recent years, Emotional Intelligence (EQ) has been hailed as a skill that is perhaps even more critical than traditional intelligence (IQ) and professional experience. Let's explore what EQ actually affects, why it is discussed at the World Economic Forum, and what tools—from diaries to books—can help you develop it.
What is EQ and why is it a "Future Skill"?
Emotional intelligence is responsible for our ability to recognize and analyze our own feelings, read the emotions of others, motivate ourselves and those around us, and manage this complex spectrum of experiences. Simply put, EQ is what helps us find common ground with people and stay resilient even in crisis situations.
This is why this skill has become critical. The World Economic Forum in Davos included EQ in the top 10 skills required for a successful career.
Why is EQ so important?
- Career Growth: People with high EQ negotiate better, manage teams more effectively, and adapt to change faster.
- Health: The inability to process emotions leads to stress and burnout. Developed EQ is the best prevention against psychosomatic diseases.
- Relationships: Understanding other people's emotions (empathy) is the key to strong friendships and a happy family.
How to Develop Emotional Intelligence? Practical Steps
1. Learn to Track and Control Your Emotions
It is difficult to understand others if you haven't "befriended" your own feelings. Natural experiences—anger, resentment, or fear—should not be suppressed, but it is important to learn to be aware of them so they don't control your decisions.
Mindfulness Tools:
- Meditation and mindful living practices.
- Emotional Dictionary: The more emotion names you know, the more accurately you can describe your state.
- Journaling: This is the most powerful tool for self-reflection. Regular entries help identify your mood triggers.
Recommendation from MriyaRun:
To make journaling a useful habit, use convenient modern tools.
- Try our Web Electronic Diary—a space for your thoughts, accessible at any moment.
- For deep emotional processing, we created the specialized EQ Diary. It is structured to help you develop emotional competence faster.
2. Look and Listen (Developing Empathy)
Once you start understanding yourself, it's time to learn to understand others. You don't need a psychology degree for this.
Exercise: During a conversation with a friend or colleague, focus completely on them. Put aside your own thoughts. Watch their facial expressions, intonation, and gestures. Try to feel what the other person is feeling, not just listen to the words.
3. Work on Your Attitude Toward Problems
People with high EQ don't get stuck in negativity. To reduce anxiety when problems arise, take a sheet of paper (or open your electronic diary) and answer these questions:
- Could I have prevented this?
- What is needed to fix the situation?
- Who can I ask for help?
- What lesson can I learn from this?
- Is there anything positive in the current circumstances?
What to Read? 6 Useful Books on Emotional Intelligence
Reading is a great way to deepen your knowledge. We have selected a list of literature that will help you look at emotions from a scientific and practical perspective.
Looking for more useful materials? Check out our MriyaRun Catalog, where we have collected the best recommendations for self-development.
- Daniel Goleman — "Emotional Intelligence". The classic that popularized the concept.
- Daniel Goleman, Richard Boyatzis, Annie McKee — "Primal Leadership". How a leader's mood affects the team.
- Valeria Kozlova — "EQ-BOOST Technology". A practical guide for business and life.
- Peter Salovey, David Caruso — "The Emotionally Intelligent Manager". Clear methodologies from the creators of the EQ concept.
- Lisa Feldman Barrett — "How Emotions Are Made". A revolutionary look from a neuroscientist.
- Larry Senn — "The Mood Elevator". How to manage your feelings and emotions.
How to Check Your EQ Level?
Understanding your starting point is half the battle. There are many assessment methods, such as the shortened version of Daniel Goleman's test. It won't give a full clinical picture, but it will help form a general impression of your strengths and weaknesses.
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