This material is for informational and educational purposes only and is not medical, psychological, or psychotherapeutic advice. If you are experiencing an acute psychological condition or need professional support, please contact a doctor, psychologist, psychotherapist, or crisis service.
To gain self-confidence, the famous psychologist Robert Anthony offers the following tips:
- Recognize your strengths and weaknesses, and formulate your goals accordingly. A step-by-step system for achieving any goals
- Decide what is valuable to you, what you believe in, how you would like to see your life.
- Another important confidence tip is to analyze your plans and evaluate them from today's perspective so that you can take advantage of it when progress is made. After analyzing your past, figure out what led to your current situation.
- Try to understand and forgive those who made you suffer or did not help, even if they could. How to stop taking offense?
- Forgive yourself for mistakes, mistakes and sins. Once you've gotten some good out of a painful memory, forget it and don't go back to it. A bad past lives in your memory only until you exorcise it - this is the main confidence tip. How to treat your mistakes?
- Free up a better place for memories of past successes, however small.
- Guilt and shame will not help you succeed. Do not allow yourself to resort to them
- About an imposed sense of guilt
- The advice for confident behavior is to look for the reasons for one's insecurity in the physical, social, economic and political aspects of the situation, and not in the shortcomings of one's own personality.
- Here's another confidence tip — Don't forget that every event can be judged differently. Development and formation of self-confidence
Reality is not what each individual sees, it is nothing more than the result of an agreement between people to call things by certain names.
Secrets of self-confidence
Such a view will allow you to be more tolerant towards people and more generous to endure what may seem like humiliation. How to learn to love and respect yourself?
- A self-confident person never talks badly about himself. Avoid attributing negative traits to yourself - "stupid", "ugly", "incapable", "unlucky", "incorrigible".
- A self-confident person knows that his actions can be evaluated in any way; To be confident in yourself - use constructive criticism for your own good. The main thing is not to let others criticize you as a person.
- A confident person remembers that any defeat is luck; from this you may conclude that false goals were pursued, which were not worth the effort, and possible further greater troubles were avoided.
- Don't put up with people, activities or circumstances that make you feel inferior = that's how a confident person works. If you can't change them or enough to feel confident, it's better to just turn away from them.
Secrets of self-confidence from psychologists
The first secret of confidence is to allow yourself to relax, to be able to listen to your thoughts, to do what you like, alone with yourself. In this way, you will be able to understand yourself better. How to confidently make a decision?
Practice communication - this is the next secret of confident behavior. Enjoy the feeling of the energy that people exchange. imagine that they may also feel fear and insecurity, and try to help them.
Decide what you want from them and what you can give them. And then let them know that you are ready for such an exchange. How to become a leader in a team?
Stop over-protecting your "I" - it is much stronger and more plastic than you think. The whole secret of confidence lies in activity. It is better for your inner world to experience a short-term emotional shock than to remain inactive and isolated.
Choose several serious long-term goals, the path of which requires the achievement of smaller, intermediate goals. Soberly consider what means are necessary to achieve these intermediate goals. How to raise a confident child?
Don't overlook your every successful step and don't forget to encourage and praise yourself!
A person can feel anxious and still act. Confidence often means not “I will certainly win,” but “I can prepare, notice an error, ask for help, and adjust.”
Experience of acting in different situations
Experience follows beginning
Waiting for complete readiness maintains avoidance. Workable experiments provide facts about skill and needed support. A step should be small enough to start and meaningful enough to teach.
Environment matters too
Humiliation, unpredictable rules, or an unsafe group can suppress existing competence. Sometimes the answer is a clearer context, allies, and boundaries.
Words from Dmytro Telushko
“Confidence grows not from convincing ourselves we are exceptional, but from experience: I can meet uncertainty and retain choice.”
Dmytro Telushko
MriyaRun tool
CBT SHIFT helps test catastrophic predictions and record the actual outcome.
CBT SHIFT