Procrastination is a very common phenomenon and avoidance appears not only from the fear of failure, but also in very different unexpected moments, for example, the fear of success, where there is an attempt to avoid responsibility and possible criticism. Where the lack of experience is frightening and there may be other options for secondary benefits from procrastination... as they say, everyone has their own "cockroaches in the head"
On the one hand, procrastination does me a favor. She protects me from some unpleasant truths about myself.
It helps to avoid uncomfortable and possibly threatening sensations. She gives a convenient excuse for why I am not moving in a direction that is somehow unpleasant to me. But whatever the reasons for procrastination and whatever comfort it may bring me, I will also pay a certain price for it.
Research also confirms that low self-esteem also contributes to procrastination. My self-perception — whether I am confident that I can succeed and whether I can appreciate who I am — is formed from the earliest days of my life.
Today it is known that the brain is programmed to be "ultrasocial", it literally grows and develops according to how people who care about us react to us.
This means that caregivers do much more than change diapers and feed: "They stimulate brain development through emotional availability and interaction."
A mother who is relatively free from anxiety and able to enjoy her child and feel the child's ever-changing needs will help her child become an adult who can manage emotions, trust others, have good self-esteem, and maintain positive expectations. These abilities are the basis of confidence and healthy self-esteem.
Horror, shame, guilt, disgust, and self-loathing are often side effects of old memories. With the thinking parts of my brain, I can override the activation of my implicit memories, create alternative neural circuits, and rewire my brain, allowing myself to act rather than procrastinate in the paralysis of fear.
The better we are able to create wholeness within ourselves, the less likely we will become hostage to procrastination
"I know what I think best when I say it" Flannery O'Connor. A great novelist and author of short stories.
In order to track your own feelings and understand procrastination, you need to keep a diary. Patterns and themes that are not easy to identify at first often become apparent when you look at a series of events. You can also study the patterns of your thinking and emotional reactions if you add some notes about them to the description of the event itself. Monitoring your attempts and reactions can provide you with valuable information that won't get lost or twisted in your memory.
"Free writing" technique
You can use your journal to practice 'free writing'. It is the process of writing down whatever is on your mind for a limited amount of time, non-stop, non-judgmental and non-editing. Writers use this technique to force themselves to start writing or to pick up ideas that are not on the surface of their thinking.
For 10-20 minutes, you just write, even if it's the words: "I have nothing to say" or "I don't know what to write next." Don't even think about putting down your pen or stopping typing; just write down your thoughts as they come to you. Don't worry about punctuation, spelling, grammar, or whether your words make sense or are true. Do not erase, do not cross out, do not delete. The goal of free writing is not to create a masterpiece, but to get to know your thoughts and feelings and not judge them.
You can use free writing in any way that you think can help you overcome procrastination: explore your own fears, understand resistance, identify values, examine your own reactions to our approaches, and observe how you respond to change. Freewriting is effective because it helps you bypass the inner prosecutor who condemns your ideas. When you start writing non-stop, your brain can trace a chain of associations that link together, often without you knowing. (Remember that the main activity of the brain occurs outside of consciousness).
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