The phenomenon of krastination has been known for a long time. If Wikipedia is to be believed, the first mentions were from ancient authors, and the word "procrastination" is already in the Oxford dictionary from 1548. But there is still no single definition of the term.
But it's not scary, most of us know what procrastination is. This is when you need to do something important. There is time and opportunity for this, but instead you scroll through social networks or decide to urgently wash the windows in the house.
Why do we procrastinate?
Let's learn by the example of Masha. Masha wants to illustrate books. She plans to make a portfolio that would surprise the employer. She has set such a bar that she doubts the possibility of reaching it. Possible failure is frightening. Masha risks finding out that she overestimated herself and will not become an illustrator with a world name. She subconsciously postpones work on the portfolio because she wants to feel good here and now. This is one way the target becomes unpleasant. An unpleasant goal makes you procrastinate.
The harm of procrastination does not end there. Masha scolds herself for inactivity. The longer she does not act, the more often she scolds herself and becomes unhappy. Fear of failure led her to inaction, and inaction to self-blame. The domino effect leads one negative to another. She continues to lose time in which she would have moved forward and where progress would have made her happier. Masha would be more happy with life, because she would go in the chosen direction.
There are ways to overcome procrastination. Most suggest changing behavior: "just start!", "Do any action!" and so on. However, there is another way called self-compassion.
How self-compassion works
Self-compassion stands on three pillars.
1. Understanding and self-compassion. Let's continue the example with Masha. Her parents shamed her for twos and demanded only fives. Since then, she has focused on perfect results. This attitude causes stress and affects her actions. But Masha analyzes the reasons for her actions and finds understanding. She sees that the circumstances have turned out like this, and she no longer scolds herself. At the same time, she sympathizes with herself as a friend in trouble. Masha says: "It's hard for me. How can I take care of myself?". She does not feel sorry for herself and does not say: "Poor me." Caring is different from pity. Care helps to move forward.
2. Realizing that others have the same problems. Masha procrastinates. It seems to her that she cannot cope alone in the world. Then comes the realization: procrastination is a human trait. Other people procrastinate. People's goals are different, but their reactions are similar to Masha's. Being aware of the commonality you share with others helps you not to feel alone. Masha feels a connection with people who are also overcoming difficulties.
3. Awareness of negativity. Masha posts her work on the Internet. They write to her a scathing comment indicating mistakes. Masha rushes to correct the work and is so absorbed in it that she forgets about her well-being. She does not notice the negative feelings that the problem caused. This continues until Masha listens to herself. Observing thoughts and feelings allows her to notice negative ones among them. Without noticing negative thoughts, it is impossible to respond to them with self-compassion.
Self-compassion reduces procrastination
Professor Sirois conducted research. She gave questionnaires to 750 people and measured their levels of self-compassion, procrastination and stress. It turned out that those who had little self-compassion procrastinated and stressed more. It suggests that the less self-compassion you have, the more prone you are to procrastination.
Self-compassion beats procrastination. You don't waste energy on self-blame and feelings of loneliness. You increase your strength because you are kind to yourself and help yourself. This gives you confidence that you will survive failures and can take risks. You take action and break a domino effect where inaction leads to self-blame.
Let's see what the Sioris study does not say:
- if you have little self-compassion, it directly causes procrastination. Procrastination is initially caused by factors such as perfectionism, as in the example with Masha.
- less self-compassion directly causes procrastination stress. Stress is first caused by self-blame and feelings of loneliness.
Other researchers have found that those who forgive themselves for their mistakes procrastinate less. Sirois points out that self-compassion encompasses more ways to help yourself than just forgiving your mistakes. Thus, self-compassion is more helpful in combating procrastination.
How to measure procrastination and self-compassion
The level of procrastination can be measured using the Irrational Procrastination scale (IPS). More than 16,000 people passed it.
The Christine Neff Self-Compassion Scale (SCS) measures all three components of self-compassion and then calculates an average.
Finally
Procrastination is a dangerous addiction-like problem that causes a lot of guilt and shame, and can destroy a person over time. Self-compassion is a new researched way to defeat procrastination, through kindness, not willpower and coping.
