Endless to-do lists and constant pressure (not to mention non-stop meetings) will drive even the hardest-working manager out of his mind. And yet, you can learn to balance the pressure and at the same time motivate others to improve themselves.

The promotion opportunity that you have been dreaming about for three long years has appeared. You secretly hope that they will hire an "inside" person, and not some unknown and good-for-nothing upstart who knows nothing about your field of work. You, together with several colleagues, propose your candidacies. Jackpit! Wise leadership chooses you. You spend the whole Sunday dragging folders and all sorts of trinkets from your corner to an office with a real door.

Polite manners are clearly outdated, you quietly say to yourself closer to 11 in the morning. You're hitting the keys harder than necessary, sending out letters explaining the new system you're stubbornly trying to implement. No one thanked you for breakfast, much less congratulated you on your new position and moving to a new office.

Now everything is different. Your inseparable friends are now your subordinates, and "mixing these two crafts" is not worth it. Remember how your mother told you: I am not your friend! I'm a mother!" It seems that you can get confused here.

Let me explain: the other employees who applied for the position think they deserve it more than you do. They are angry. In addition, they will look for confirmation of their opinion about you and wait for you to make a mistake. It won't be long (I don't mind having to let you know). They knew you weren't professional enough.

We just have to be right, right? Must. There is a strong incentive to be right. When we strongly believe in something and something destroys our belief, our brains just boil to challenge this data. Sometimes we don't even think about the information we receive. Cognitive dissonance can cause people to deny information that contradicts their existing belief system.

In addition, sooner or later everyone who works with you will have to give feedback on the results of their work. This, as a rule, is not the most pleasant activity. Especially if the system is built in such a way that your guys are used to going with the flow. It's best to establish positive relationships early in your career in a new position...while, of course, not losing your authority as a manager.

It is pleasant and exciting for a select few. For most, this is a bitter pill. Every move you make in public is watched, every step is explained. Have you ever realized the report in how much attention you get?! Don't dwell on it.

One Thinking VP of Marketing with a great creative streak admitted:

I don't envy celebrities. It seems to me that their life differs from imprisonment only in external decorations. Imagine: you can't go to the park, the playground, the grocery store, the local bistro without being looked at, photographed, or written notes in newspapers. Personal space disappears as quickly as one-day hits.

The lives of executives in most professions do not, of course, match the level of scrutiny of the lives of superstars in sports, music, movies and royalty, but they are watched too. The fact that you decide to order a large triple hot vanilla latte with no foam and skim milk from Starbucks on the first floor of the office is unlikely to get your photo on the cover of the tabloids. This is just the potential reason that some of the employees behind you rushing to order coffee in the morning line will look up from their phones and give you an annoyed look.

On the other hand, when you are in a position of influence, the resonance increases if you treat employees well, conduct volunteer campaigns, and train newcomers. General attention provides an opportunity to become a positive role model.

Let's talk about the impact of coaching styles. Our society, accustomed to the "everyone gets their own trophy" model, takes what I call "positivity" seriously. A manager's job is to keep employees positive, right? In relation to yourself, to your tasks and, as a result, to the manager as well.

My leadership development programs often include exercises that at first glance seem impossible to the participants. The teams are given a group task, after which they have to tell me that they have achieved, in their opinion, the most positive result possible with the available resources. As a rule, the participants soon call me over and declare that the task is completed. But the level of work is much lower than average. I refuse to accept the result and say: I'm sure they can do better. I remind them that I am very busy and ask them not to bother me again until the result is 200% improved. After that I move away (this is my favorite part).

What happened that caused such an improvement in the result ... and incidentally strengthened the team spirit? In fact, inspiration for a positive result is more important than a positive attitude.

The natural features of many contribute to the fact that they become coaches focused on a positive attitude. However, it is the encouragement of self-improvement, the achievement of remarkable results, and not focusing on previous successes that helps both the coach and the team to feel good. A wonderful result is a natural drug. And the coach also scores points, having earned respect and admiration.

When people do boring routine work, they feel mediocre. In this case, praise does not cause pleasure. Instead, their value decreases. Employees realize that their manager is setting the bar low, and take an example from him. In the same way, they treat the result of their work as something average, nothing more.

Coaching mandate

My favorite trainer: ________________

Now make a list of adjectives that characterize this person: ______________

Consider the list. Was this person an upbeat coach? Did he push you to overcome yourself and was, accordingly, aimed at a positive result? More often than not, the best coaches are models of toughness out of mercy. We understand that they invest in us, believe in our potential and strive for our success. Their faith in us is not expressed in a stream of nauseatingly enthusiastic epithets. On the contrary, they make fun of us, pressure us, mock us so that we overcome, overcome and once again overcome the existing barriers. We are trying our best to reach the level that they consider successful for us.

Involving the team in decision-making can seem like the infamous Pandora's box. Therefore, many managers act alone. And yet, if this process is properly organized, employees will develop a sense of responsibility and involvement. In addition, you will get rid of the heavy burden of making a decision alone.

In a typical work culture, seeking consensus can be a major drain on energy, time, and resources. But how the hell to achieve it? In any group where there are more than two participants, achieving consensus is a very bold endeavor. People have different points of view, views, interests and personal characteristics. Saying we won't do anything until we come to an agreement is crazy, right? What to do when people can't agree? Lock them in a boardroom for a few weeks and hope for the best?

Try multivoting. It has everything: simplicity, fairness, ease of use, flexibility. It looks good too. Maybe not always so. I guess it depends on what stickers you use. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Let's say you are a member of a group (of six to a hundred people) that needs to either prioritize a list of options or choose a direction.

Participants vote by placing stickers next to their chosen option(s). If someone prefers one option that is optimal for him, he will give it all three votes. If he has the first (preferred) and second (slightly less preferred) options, he will place two stickers opposite the first and one opposite the second. If he is equally interested in the three options, he can distribute all three stickers - one for each.

During a normal vote, participants raise their hand, supporting the option that is optimal for them. Multi-voting allows them to show how much they support that option... and flag other possible options.

This method is effective because no one feels left out. It is a fair and open system.

As a result, participants decide much faster than if they had to reach a consensus.

This exercise seems simple only at first glance. I give teams of three to eight people a set of seven plastic geometric figures, one of which is shaped like an arrowhead. Minimum instructions: using all the parts, create five arrows of the same size and shape at the same time.

Some groups cope with the task quickly, some take half an hour or more, some cannot solve the task at all. Most often, groups realize that it is easy to assemble four arrows, but the fifth lacks parts. I carefully count the seven pieces on the table and assure them that there are enough resources.

Have you ever worked with a team that would claim the same? "We don't have enough resources to complete the task"? And then another team achieves the impossible with the same or even fewer resources?

The most common mistake I see in these situations is that the negative opinion is voiced too loudly or for too long, before the team has had a chance to examine the situation, and the manager does not stop it. Negative energy can threaten the performance of the entire team.

When you ignore or downplay the importance of one person's negative thought, the effect spreads far beyond their individual consciousness. Talk to him, find a reason, discuss alternatives, ask for support. Do not let a small flame turn into a wild bonfire that will destroy everything at the root.

Some managers believe that results, not relationships, are most important. However, they are closely and even inextricably linked with each other. First of all, there is a discrepancy in how the manager's communication with subordinates is evaluated by himself and the people around him. Research has shown that 92% of managers gave themselves an excellent or good rating for managing employees, while only 67% of their subordinates agreed. It's no wonder managers spend an average of seven or more hours a week dealing with interpersonal conflicts.